Taking Care of The Elderly

What does this mean? Does it mean that you forget why you walked into a room? Does it mean that you forget what your child/spouse/mailman looks like? (wait, what does my mailman look like???)

 

No to the first question, and sadly, yes to the second. And there are many levels in between.

 

The medical dictionary site says:

Dementia is a loss of mental ability severe enough to interfere with normal activities of daily living, lasting more than six months, not present since birth, and not associated with a loss or alteration of consciousness.

For more detailed information click here: https://medical-dictionary.thefreedictionary.com/dementia

 

Unlike a stroke, dementia usually creeps up on you. One day you forget that you put a coffee cup in the microwave to warm it up, and then, down the road a bit, one day you find yourself in a strange place that has pictures of people you feel you should know but can’t quite place.

But like a stroke, dementia is the death of brain cells. A lot of what is on the “Stroke” page is applicable here also, so I won’t repeat it.

 

A word you will hear a lot of when dealing with dementia is “cueing.” This means promoting the person to finish a sentence or a task. If you suspect a loved one is showing signs of dementia, have them checked out. Keep having them checked out until you get an appropriate answer.

 

Keep in mind that some medications can mimic dementia, and that stress can cause dementia like symptoms.

 

My mother is, I believe, beginning to suffer from dementia. She is not comfortable being alone, because she forgets things and it upsets her.  She has us watch her closely when we are out so she doesn’t get lost. She will ask us repeatedly what we are doing. “Walking down to dinner mom.” Ok, so what are we doing? “Walking down to dinner mom.” It is as frustrating for her as it is for us.

The difference between her and some other sufferers is that she is aware of what is happening and is willing to work with us to take care of her.  We have all agreed to communicate openly and without prevarication, and that has removed so much stress.

 

Note: what I mean by that is, we are honest with her.  When she asks us if she is repeating a story she told us 5 minutes ago, we say yes.  When she begins to complain about how upset she is that she cannot remember anything, we DO NOT tell her that its ok, that we forget things too all the time.  She doesn’t need or even want to hear that. She needs and wants us to tell her that it is ok…because she matters to us.

 

There is a long and bumpy road ahead of us and her with this process well on its way in her brain, so we are treasuring the time we have with her now and making memories that we can share with her and one another later when she no longer can.

It is scary and we are just starting this journey. As it progresses, I may add more information to this page.